Beware Dear Colleagues!

You come up with a new idea and there will be 10 others ready to oppose it!

I feel happy about people finding mistakes in the work I have done on my new idea. This gives me the opportunity to have a look at my work from different angles.

Someone throw negatives on my idea, I pick them up turn them into positives and add to my idea. So their motive behind throwing negatives is defeated and also now the idea has come up even better (without any loopholes).

So those throwing negatives on my ideas, beware. You might actually be making my idea even more strong ;)

Expectations!

Do I have any chance to get admission in IIMs? No
Do I enjoy the job I am doing right now? No
Do I have a satifying relationship? No
Do I have any chance of marrying son of some Ambani or Mittal? No
Then why am I living?

This is the conversation I heard today morning while in cab on my way to office. A colleague of mine took 5 days off as she was not well. And what was the illness - she was in depression. The lady is just 21. She gulped the whole bottle of shampoo thinking this would end her worries.

I wonder what does this new generation want. The expectations are getting higher and higher...from self, from relationships and from life. They do not want to settle for less. Yes its good to have the best... but is it right to expect so much that if the expectations are not met, life seems to be worthless?

There are 2 ways of looking at life.

One - look at the best and repent why u don't have that.

And the second - look at the worst and be happy that u have better.

I would like to choose the latter because of the simple reason that it makes me happy. Though it has a risk of achieving little less. But I wouldn't mind taking that risk if it gives me peace of mind.

P.S. - Do drop in a line and let me know your views on this.

Ladies Coupe

A nice thing about reading a "good book" is - it leaves you with lots of thoughts to ponder upon.

Book I read today - Ladies coupe. Life of a lady... her journey from when she achieves womenhood... to feeling like a women...what makes a women complete... to her search for happiness from the perspective of 6 ladies traveling in a same coupe - the Ladies coupe. They come from different backgrounds but have something in common. They all are in search of themselves... in search of real happiness. Their lives are either guided by their fathers, brothers, husbands or sons. They have similar questions. How much liberty do they have to take decisions of their life? Are they just the extensions of the men in their lives?

The protagonist Akila has been living her life on what is expected of her rather than what she wants for herself.
"I don't care what anyone thinks. I am who I am. And I have as much right as anyone else to live as I chose" one of her friends had told her once.
True. In my view true happiness comes when you do what you want to do and are not ruled by the guidlines put together by "so called society".

But the question arises - till what extent. You can't just do anything you wish to? Society has some norms.
I would say - who is society, who has made those norms? Its people like you and me. We make society, so why can't we frame the laws that make us happy rather than sad. Why do we want to look at a lady only as either a daughter, a wife or a mother and not as an individual who other than taking care of people around her, is an individual with her own needs, her own wishes, and her own desires? Why can't we let her live her life on her terms? Why do we have so many regulations for her when there are none for their male counterparts?

Some of other lines in the book that touched me and I would like to mention here are - "You mustn't become one of those women who groom to please others. The only person you need to please is yourself. When you look into a mirror, the reflection should make you feel happy."

My wish list...

Travel around the world. Meet as many people possible. Live with them and experience their world. Wanna study various cultures.

When I started writing this thot it wud be a long long list but strangely at present this the only wish I can think of... There are some secret wishes as well that I am not going to reveal here ;-)

Set yourself free!

They say -
Let it be unknown thats anonymous!

I resist -
You will not find lands unknown
if you dont explore for the fear of getting lost.
And neither will you be able to find shells
if you don't dive deep for the fear of drowning.

You will not find yourself
if you dont come out of your shell for the fear of embarrasing yourself.
And neither will you find your love
if you don't express your feelings for the fear of rejection.

And how will you experience that wonderful feeling
if you don't let yourself be for the fear of being judged.

This is the land unknown - "Dream land"
where you'll find true happiness...
Go explore the world,
find the unknown outside and within.

Dear Terrorist,

Have you ever tried bringing a smile on someone's face? I have and believe me there's nothing in this world that gives more satisfaction than this. Be it giving a rikshawwala an extra 20 bucks because he had asked for little less than others being new to the city, or helping a small girl getting that flower she is trying to reach from past few min, or feeding a small hungry child a parantha that you would have thrown otherwise.

How can you derive satisfaction from harming others, killing others. Nothing can justify the tears of a mother who has lost her small child in front of her eyes, the tears of a new bride who lost her husband, the tears of an old man who lost his only hope.

Just try bringing smile to someone's face once and see if that brings more satisfaction or harming people for some reason unknown.

For the unmarried guys out there!!!

The other day I was talking to one of my friends and was surprised to know the views of educated young men (even today)

Answering to the query about the kind of life partner he's looking for, he says..."one who can cook for me and other family members, who can do all household work, who can take care of him when he's back from his office, who can.... and list goes on. She should also be beautiful, from a good family, highly educated and again list goes on... "So you want a beautiful educated homely girl" I asked. He protests and adds "No, she will be allowed to work, but she should be back home before me."

I think he doesn't want a life partner but someone who can keep him and his family happy and at the same time can earn some money rather than being paid for the good work she is doing for them.

Don't take me wrong. I am not against 'bahu' taking care of her in laws and husband, but I just want to ask the guys - "what about her own identity". What did he mean when he said "she will be allowed to work". Doesn't she has the right to choose whether or not she wants to work after marriage???

I am a married lady myself, living happily. My parents-in -law are even closer than my own parents. We all are seperate individuals bound with lots of love, care and support.

Respect as an individual is what a girl coming from a different family wants. You love her, support her, and respect her as an individual and in return you will get all you look for in a 'bahu'. A girl loves to do household work, cooking for her family, taking care of them as long as she is treated as an individual and gets full respect from all in the family.

You expect world from her... but just have a look inside you. Are you good enough to be a life partner of a person who has so many abilities???

Me - a selector!

I hate selling myself in interviews, though I have always been able to do that successfully :p. I fail to understand how a person can be judged based on a small chat. Ok, his schooling, education, colleges he studied in, and past performances can throw light on how good he/she is, but then, might be the person have never got the chance to study in best colleges or showcase his abilities till now. Will that mean he is not capable of doing?

If I had a company of my own and I got a chance to select people, I would have a different criteria altogether. No interviews at all, those reading this blog and looking for a job might be praying that I become an owner of some big company miraculously :)

Might sound strange but my criteria would be
- Where he belongs, A person coming from a small town is mostly hardworking.
- I might as well play a small game with him and see what all he does to win that game. That'll gimme an idea of his thinking, mind set and his priorities...like winning is the only aim he has or is he concerned about the path he has taken to win, into consideration, as well;
- Punctuality and respect for other's ideas and opinions would be amongst other qualities I would look for, in him.

People, keep praying for me and I will some day own a big company and select you on the basis of who you are and not on how your CV looks like.

Where are we heading?!!!

Waiting for the bus to come. Oh its already 8.10am. Have to reach office by 9.30am. Even starting at 8am doesn't help. :( Have been waiting for bus from past 10 min.

And here is the bus, so full :( will I be able to board it? It stops. There is whole lot of people waiting to get into it. While I was thinking whether to opt for taking this one and suffer the crowd or to take next one and suffer the glances of boss on getting late... I got a push from behind and I found myself already in the bus :)

Now this is a typical Delhi bus.
That aunt is still trying to board and driver starts the bus. Thankfully she is not hurt.
I am standing on one foot. Thank god I have got that much space...Look at that girl and that boy who are half outside the bus.
Hey can anyone tell me why is driver stopping the bus at mother dairy? There is no one to get down and a whole lot again standing to board the bus. The bus stops, people board the bus somehow. Luckily, driver has offered 3 of us to sit on the engine, wow lucky we! But soon after taking our seats we realized how lucky we are. I hope u got me right ;)

All these people look so similar but everyone have their own stories. Look at them carefully...
Oh poor aunt, she is lost in her own world. She is not even aware that the stop she was supposed to get down, has already passed. she might have left her kids alone at home and is thinking if they will be able to manage and cursing her luck to have married a man who has left her alone to face all this.

That man there... Whom is he talking to? I hope my eyes are not defying me! He is talking to himself. The load of his family has made him like that.

And that girl who is not as lucky to get the engine to sit on...that guy has been teasing her since she has gotten into the bus. And look at the people around. They have conveniently closed their eyes to it or probably they are too engrossed in the tensions of their lives to look into something like this.

That old man...he seems to be satisfied with his life...looks calm and contended. Probably he has already understood the gist of life.
And that young group of people, nice bubbly group, unaware of the things life will bring along!

Every person has his own story, his own share of joys and sorrows.
Engrossed in their daily lives, running towards....even they do not know what!

The bus stops. I have to get down here. Hope we all reach where we want to, one day! But where are we all upto?!!!

Another step ahead….

Today we finalized the deal for our new house. A big house, beautiful surroundings, elite people, all facilities….In all a leap forward in life.

Two strangers came to Delhi…with their ideologies, philosophy and dreams. Not sure of their fate in a new unknown city, but were sure of their capabilities. Met strangely, shared thoughts, liked each other’s philosophy, decided to walk this journey in stranger city together….No big dreams, they just knew how to be happy in all situations.

Very humble start, lots of hard work….struggled for 6 full years before they decided to announce it formally to the society that they are together in this strange journey in strange city where every one seemed to be self centric. One thing they always kept in mind is not to forget celebrating life. Not that they always were on right track but yes they kept reminding each other... And that’s what made their life so special. Lots of hardships on the way. It’s been more than 4 years now and every year they are facing one or the other challenge literally. But the good thing is - they know that it’s temporary and will go away…so keep going and celebrate life is the mantra.

Thinking changed, philosophies changed….and they changed. They had to….This city changed them. Now the dreams are no more small. They know how to handle those self centered people and be one of them at times... But still they are same at heart…The basic philosophy still remains the same - "Celebrate Life" 

Journey down the memory lane...

I still remember the day I came to Delhi leaving behind my family, my people, beautiful Palampur and much more.....

Today I am getting drowned in the pool of nostalgia. I remember the day I came to this city. Did I ever think that I would call this alien city, alien people...as my own. A small village girl wanted to come out of her shell and try her luck, that is what many people would say but I came here not to try my luck but to test my abilities. I wanted a life where I do not have any regrets. I wanted to follow my instincts and thats exactly what I did. I came out and started finding myself. I knew staying in the protective shell of family would be easier but at the same time will not allow me to explore myself. Thanks papa for supporting all my decisions.

Today whatever my life is...is mine...I have chosen it. While I was studying I starting earning and supporting myself financially. That gave me immense sense of achievement that I am on my own in this unknown city. Whatever I achieve will be my own. After completing my PGDBM got the offers from relatives to join them or their knowns, but I was "not interested". I wanted to get the job and success the hard way, without anyone's help...starting from the scratch. And I did it.

Not only career but also in my personal life, I wanted something different. Never wanted to marry a typical Sood guy and get into usual family matters....he gave me this on this occasion, why did he tell me this...and so on....So here I found a person sharing the same thoughts and philosophy...U know whom I am talking about. :)

I never bothered what the society norms are, what am I expected to behave like...just kept following my instincts. The best thing I had with me was the trust of my family in me, they knew I will not do anything wrong and that gave me strength to be a good human being. Got lots of oppositions as well on the way and am sure of getting many more.... :) But who bothers. The ones who criticized me that time, give my example to their kids now.

The journey started...a humble start...good till now...but where will it end...Delhi, Bengal, Himachal or some other place...I don't know. On the way got to know lots of people, good, not so good, some were just acquaintances and some left an everlasting impression. More than anything else I got to know "myself".....still in the process of knowing myself...